Years ago I was talking with someone about ultra-running, a sport I had taken up and enjoyed (until my knees rebelled against me!). He asked, “what is the longest race you’ve ever run”? At the time, the answer was 91.3 miles in 24 hours. When I told him this he had a shocked look on his face and said, “How can you do that?” My answer was simple–“Start, then don’t stop”.
Tomorrow, Donna and I will celebrate a hallmark in our lives–36 years of marriage–and will officially have been married twice as many years as we were single (do the math:-)). Given our relative youth:-) and the increasingly rare number of marriages making it to 36 years, I’ve been asked the same question about marriage I was asked about running: “How can you do that?” My answer is simple, and the same as above–“Start, then don’t stop”.
When we were 18 years old, we made vows to one another neither of us remotely understood. Nevertheless, we made the vows–and not just to one another, but to God. It took us only a matter of months to reach the point where we both admitted to the other than we not only “didn’t love” the other, we didn’t even like each other. Even today we both remember that conversation clearly. No anger, no yelling or stomping around–just simple resignation. You see, we had made vows, and neither of us intended to break them. We both feared we would be miserable the rest of our lives, but we started. We would not stop.
The Lord was gracious and allowed us to grow up. He matured us together and within a few years people were looking to us for guidance because “we seemed to love one another so much”. And we did. Because we started. And we didn’t stop.
One of the most enjoyable moments in an an ultra race is the finish. Crossing the finish line after having done something that took every bit of dedication and commitment we could muster is an amazingly satisfying and joyous thing. Even if I didn’t enjoy every step of the race, I enjoyed having started and not stopped.
Tomorrow we will enjoy our day together. We may squabble a bit, we still do sometimes. But we won’t stop loving (read that “doing what is best for the other”) each other. We’ll look at each other and remember the teenager we married. We’ll marvel at how she put up with me all these years:-). We’ll look at pictures of our three kids–God’s gift to our union–and our eight grandchildren. We’ll be somewhat awestruck–and immensely grateful. And we won’t stop.
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